Fit Healthy Mama

I was skinny most of my life, thanks to my mom´s good healthy cooking. We ate a lot of veggies from the garden and homemade brown bread. Everything was healthy. As children we were forbidden to eat sweets, candy or drink soda. At the time we thought it was silly, but now I realize how good it was for me!

Early Days

When I was about 12, we moved to a more suburban area and started attending church again and I joined a youth group. After the group ended, there was always pop and chips and I started eating those. As I earned my own money, I started to buy chocolate and cookies and all manner of junk food. Then, at 14, I got depressed and remained depressed throughout my teen years. At 18, I fell into such a funk and I ate to feel better, which obviously didn´t help!

In just one year, I went from being a hot size 4 to a fat size 16. Everyone was telling me how unhealthy I looked, how fat I was and I chose to ignore them. Until I had moved out adn one day saw a photo of myself taken at a bachelorette party for a friend. I was FAT! There were dimples in my elbows . . . my face was round . . . I cried for about an hour and then decided to get rid of the weight. The only way I could think of to quit such an addiction was to just go cold turkey.

The Year of Anorexia

Obviously, it´s not possible to completely stop eating, but I did my best. I ate virtually nothing for 6 months, half a banana a day, or a tiny cup of yogurt. If I felt hunger pains, I would suck on a hard candy to bring my blood sugar up without ingesting many calories.

On Saturday´s, when I went to visit my family, I would eat dinner there, just so they wouldn´t know what was going on. I felt horrid afterwards, and wouldn´t eat for the rest of the weekend. My parents never had a clue, they just thought I was eating carefully. Each week, they would compliment me on how thin I was getting.

After six months and 60 pounds lost, I finally started to eat a bit more again, but still mostly veggies and fruit. This was mostly at the urging of my roomie who was the only one who knew that I wasn´t eating. He had the opposite problem, being too skinny, so he was constantly eating!

The Repercussions

You can´t deprive your body of food almost completely for 6 months without having some problems. I was constantly sick for the following year, which was right before I planned to head to Central America. Any passing bug would affect me and I was more depressed than ever, albeit skinny now! In retrospect, the worst thing I could have done was quit eating completely.

Relative Peace

I managed to keep that weight off and even lose more as I traveled. The constant walking in the streets of Antigua, Guatemala, where I stopped, kept me in fine shape and I also hit the gym every morning with a friend. The result? I was in excellent shape and looked great.

Then I got pregnant with my first son. I´d lost three babies before him, so this time, I was terrified. I did as little as possible, working at my teaching job sitting down and then going home and laying in bed. Morning sickness hit with a vengeance and I ended up eating potato chips and sipping Pepsi because they were the only things I could keep down. At my four month checkup the doctor told me to start eating better because I hadn´t gained an ounce! So, I took his words to heart and started scarfing everything in sight. And ended up gaining nearly 45 lbs.

After the first baby, I lost a bit of weight, but found that I was pregnant again 7 months later. This time I really tried not to gain too much and managed to get through the pregnancy with just a 15 lb. weight gain. It was after the baby that things got out of control.

Gaining It All Back

The birth of my second baby so soon after the first had me worn out. I was working now, from home, and trying to manage an active toddler and a newborn while balancing deadlines was just hard to do. I was as exhausted as I´d been with the first, but unable to nap! So I turned to caffeine. Chocolate, Pepsi, coffee . . . if it was meant to pep you up and was full of sugar, I´d ingest it and in great quantities. That, combined with a lot of sitting as I worked on the computer, turned into extra pounds.

I had always planned to make sure my kids ate healthy and didn´t drink soda . . . but they do drink Pepsi because Mama does. They eat fries and chips and go bonkers over chocolate because they´ve seen me eating it. My second baby is now a year old and I´m far heavier than I was after his birth. I realize that I can´t just stop eating again, though it´s tempting, and finding a way to ensure that my entire family gets back on the health track is vital. We´re working on it. I´m trying to lose weight and give my boys healthier food. This blog will chronicle it all and hopefully in a year, we´ll be at that healthy place and I´ll be a healthy weight and this blog will be an encouragement to everyone looking for the same thing.